So "Chapter Two" is over now.
I have to stop so my heart and my mind and my emotions catch back up with my words.
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This is a difficult thing. I have reached this wonderful point in my life here where I am established and comfortable and know people and can find my way around the city. And here I find myself at this crossroad of comfort and happiness and stability & wisdom and security and knowledge of the next few years.
This last semester, these last six months, have absolutely been the best six months of my life. I have learned so much about who I am and what I like to do and who I want to be. People typically ask me "If you could go back in time, knowing what you know now, would you still move to Chicago?" and I can answer with every bit of confidence inside of me YES. I do not regret moving here at all. I learned so much about myself. I also learned so much about other people. The only thing I would change is planning school-wise more so I wouldn't have to move back to Missouri after only living here for six months. Haha.
There are obviously a billion things I love about Chicago, but I will keep the list short for now.
1. My moxie here.
I didn't even know what the word "moxie" was until a month or so ago, so if you have no idea what that means, don't worry..no one is judging you. It's "the ability to face difficulty with spirit and courage." (Thanks, FreeDictionary.com) There have definitely been some difficult days and even more difficult nights, but I told myself time and time again that I was going to make this a good thing, and if that didn't work, my mom told me that I was going to make this a good thing, and if that didn't work, my best friend told me that I was going to make this a good thing.
I have had this amazing revelation in my life. I learned about these things called priorities. I never knew how overpacked my life was before moving to Chicago. School, work, this group of friends, that group of friends, this organization, finally getting to homework, practicing, etc. Important things left out of this equation: church, exercise, general alone time.. I hadn't factored in the importance of these things before they were all I had. I moved here with a brand new, beautiful fresh start and a completely open schedule.
Here's what I learned about myself: I don't have to be busy to be happy.
I don't have to be busy to be happy.
Happiness is pursuing the things that you enjoy - the things that make you better. Happiness is not a city.
I have been working with a personal trainer and he has pushed me and helped me so much. I am so proud of the things I have accomplished with him. I love working out. I love making myself a better Kristen. I'm proud of the way I've pushed myself - the moxie I've developed. And a lot of that has to do with Michael.
2. My job.
I talk about my job all the time. It's not even a real job. I mean, it is. But playing with my nieces is the coolest thing EVER. Yes, I am going to have withdrawals. Kate and Grace are probably my two favorite people in the world. Sassy pants and all.
3. --I'm going to stop.
I literally wrote out a bunch of things that I love about living here last night and I wrote over 50. I thought of more today. So I'm going to stop. Also, I took a sleeping pill about thirty minutes ago and things are going to stop making sense pretty quickly unless I stop soon.
So basically, if you're wondering about me, here's the scoop: I am really really sad that I am leaving Chicago. I am looking forward to what MWSU will bring me in the next couple of years. I have learned to make life happen for me instead of merely reacting to life as it happened TO me. I am happy.
I'm happy in Chicago and I will be happy in St. Joseph too.
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